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Separation Agreement Anxiety

Published: December 8, 2010

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Separation Agreement Anxiety

Separation Agreement Anxiety

Separation is the most complex aspect of getting a divorce. You may not know the difference between the two concepts but separation and divorce are two separate events with different requirements and steps. In order to legally end your marriage in Ontario, you require both – a separation and a divorce.

The separation part begins as soon as you or your spouse decide to separate and have no reasonable prospect of getting back together. Often this is when one spouse expresses their desire to end the marriage.

Once you decide to separate, you should move quickly to draft a separation agreement. Your first step should include seeking the advice of a Toronto divorce lawyer to help you figure out all the complex details. A separation agreement is a legal document which lays out all of your rights and responsibilities. It can include the separation of property, custody, child support, and spousal support provisions. It lays the groundwork for you to continue your lives separately.

You must understand, however, that the separation agreement does not actually end the marriage. There is only one way of doing that and that is by getting a divorce. The divorce can be received, generally, only after one year of separation and does not deal with all the factors of your separation agreement as long as everything has been considered, particularly custody and support of children.

The difficulty in drafting the separation agreement is that you are forced to negotiate and make decisions that are critical at a time when you are under tremendous stress and emotional turmoil. This is not easy.

There are important issues which should be dealt with relatively quickly. Your Toronto divorce lawyer can then help you navigate the negotiations and possibly help you to take your claims to the court to get more help.

Of course, reaching consensus directly with your ex-partner is the best way of handling separation agreements. This is the way most people are able to settle issues. However, sometimes people are just unable to come to an agreement and that is what the courts are there for.

So, as hard as it is, relax, think straight and get help as soon as you need it. Soon enough all your issues will be resolved and you can focus on the rest of your life.

Written by Lisa Gelman

Senior Lawyer

Senior Lawyer Lisa Gelman has over 25 years of family law experience and founded Gelman & Associates to provide strategic legal counsel in family law matters concerning divorce, parenting, separation, and more.

Frequently Asked Questions - divorce & separation

If you are litigating your matter, social media posts made by your spouse or partner may be relevant, especially if they contradict what your spouse is claiming in his or her pleadings.

For example, if a spouse is claiming financial hardship, a Facebook post that shows that spouse going on an expensive trip or posing with an expensive car can undermine such claim  and, potentially affect that party’s credibility in court if presented as evidence on a motion or at trial.

Further to photograph-based posts, statements that are made on social media by one party can be relevant if said posts (i) are related to the litigation, to issues of parenting  and/or (b) they contradict statements that were made by the party in his or her pleadings. For example, if a party who is attempting to establish that he or she is an appropriate custodial parent, then recent social media posts about extensive partying and drug use made by that party may be relevant in court, as they may speak to that party’s fitness when it comes to appropriate supervision of a child in his or her care.

The Ontario Attorney General’s website estimates that divorce proceedings can take approximately four to six months to complete, provided that all documents have been appropriately accomplished and submitted on time.

No. The law does not favour mothers over fathers in divorce proceedings. The judge will base his decision on the evidence laid out by both parties.

The main distinction between divorce and separation is that divorce ends your marriage formally. You and your partner are no longer married.
If you’re separated, you’re still legally married to each other even if you receive a formal separation, and you must continue to record that you’re married on documents.

No. You are not required to get a lawyer for a divorce. However, it is best if you retain one to ensure that you fully understand all your rights and obligations.

A joint divorce application occurs when you and your spouse both agree to a divorce and on all other family law matters such as parenting, spousal support, or division of property.

Yes, it is different. Family law problems are addressed mainly by provincial laws in Ontario. Divorce law, on the other hand, is controlled by federal legislation in the form of the Divorce Act, which applies uniformly across the country.

Divorce can be a difficult decision to make, especially if you’re unsure if your partner will sign the petition. However, a divorce does not require your partner’s consent. Although it may be a long process if your partner doesn’t comply, they will not be able to stop you indefinitely.

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