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My abusive ex won’t leave the house! What should I do?

Published: April 5, 2016

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My abusive ex won’t leave the house! What should I do?

The law provides that married people have the right to reside in the matrimonial home regardless of ownership until there is consent or Court Order otherwise.

If you were to leave the home, you may be seen to have forfeited this right. If there are children involved, there may be significant consequences if you leave both with them and without them.

If you are in an abusive situation and are forced to leave because of this, you need to see a lawyer immediately after leaving to discuss your options as you may be able to have your spouse removed so that you can return to the home.

You can apply to the courts for exclusive possession of the matrimonial home which, if granted, allows you to stay in the home and requires your ex to live elsewhere.

Written by Lisa Gelman

Senior Lawyer

Senior Lawyer Lisa Gelman has over 25 years of family law experience and founded Gelman & Associates to provide strategic legal counsel in family law matters concerning divorce, parenting, separation, and more.

Frequently Asked Questions - family violence & domestic orders

If the person doesn’t feel comfortable leaving, you can still assist them in developing a safety plan that they can use if the violence occurs again or if they want to escape later. Simply creating a plan can assist them in seeing whatever tasks are required and help them psychologically prepare themselves.

While domestic violence is often linked to physical abuse and violent behavior, emotional abuse can also constitute domestic violance. In fact, domestic violence includes a broad range of abuse, such as physical, sexual, psychological, and verbal.

Physical violence, sexual violence, emotional violence, psychological violence, spiritual violence, cultural violence, verbal abuse, and financial abuse are among the types of violence anyone can experience within a marriage.

Photographs of the scene and injuries, obtaining medical evidence of any injuries, a recording of the emergency response call, and talking to family and friends are all considered essential evidence in a domestic violence case.

A batterer is someone who physically abuses a kid, another person, or a spouse.

Yes, there they can. Domestic violence against males can take many forms, including physical, emotional, verbal, and sexual assault. Men are abused significantly more frequently than you may think in heterosexual and same-sex relationships. It affects males of all ages and occupations, from many cultures and walks of life.

While individuals have the ability to change, they must have a strong desire to change and be devoted to all parts of change in order to do it, and even then, it’s much easier said than done. Only a small fraction of abusers actually change their habits.

It is important not to say anything that makes the victim feel like it is their fault or like they could have stopped it if they had done something differently. Do not downplay their story by telling them that many people in their situation have problems. Do not interrogate them as to why they never left the relationship earlier. Do not ask what they did to provoke the abuser or tell them that there are two sides to a story. Saying these types of things will not help the recovery or escape process. You will most likely only be affirming the abuser’s threats and manipulation tactics.

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If you need legal advice regarding family violence & domestic orders matters in Ontario, contact our Toronto family law lawyers for a free consultation. Some conditions may apply.

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