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Special Considerations for Grey Divorces

Published: July 30, 2012

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Special Considerations for Grey Divorces

When you’re in the midst of a “grey divorce,” you may have far more to worry about than someone younger. That’s because you, unlike younger couples, likely have more assets. According to The Wall Street Journal, a grey divorce is an upheaval for both parties – but it’s generally worse for women. Your North York divorce lawyer can help you hammer out the details of your grey divorce, but it’s up to you to make sure you’re prepared for the challenges that lie ahead.

Managing the Finances: Were You in the Dark?

In some long-term marriages, only one spouse manages the finances. If you were not that spouse, your North York divorce lawyer will likely advise you to familiarize yourself with where your money goes before you file for divorce. You’ll need to start managing your own finances during and after divorce, and it’s a good idea to get your feet wet before diving in headfirst.

How Grey Divorce Affects Your Living Standard

Generally, a divorce means a drop in financial stability; therefore, a drop in the parties’ living standard takes place. Your North York divorce lawyer will be able to help you understand the financial ramifications of a divorce before you begin divorce proceedings; in some cases, it’s necessary for one party to get an additional job or find another source of income in order to be able to survive the financial fallout.

Grey Divorce and Employment

If you haven’t worked during the course of your marriage, your North York divorce lawyer may advise you to get a job during your divorce. A job can provide you with a measure of financial stability, which is especially important if your spouse won’t be providing for you any longer, and it can provide you with a diversion from the stresses of divorce.

Insurance: Will You be Covered?

Health and life insurance are important at any stage of life. However, if you use your spouse’s prescription coverage, or you’re listed on his or her life insurance policy, you’ll need to plan for your own coverage before you divorce. Ask your North York divorce lawyer what options are available to you both during and after your divorce.

Adult Children of Grey Divorce

Your North York divorce lawyer can help you with the technical end of your grey divorce, but it’s up to you to deal with the emotional end. Your adult children may have a tough time dealing with your divorce, because your marriage is all they’ve ever known. If, after talking to your adult children, you determine that you need some outside help, ask your North York divorce lawyer for a referral to a local counselor or family therapist. He or she may know someone who’s highly qualified to help your family come through a divorce emotionally intact.

Remember, your North York divorce lawyer is there to help. He or she is experienced in handling divorces and can provide advice that pertains to your unique situation.

Written by Lisa Gelman

Senior Lawyer

Senior Lawyer Lisa Gelman has over 25 years of family law experience and founded Gelman & Associates to provide strategic legal counsel in family law matters concerning divorce, parenting, separation, and more.

Frequently Asked Questions - divorce & separation

If you are litigating your matter, social media posts made by your spouse or partner may be relevant, especially if they contradict what your spouse is claiming in his or her pleadings.

For example, if a spouse is claiming financial hardship, a Facebook post that shows that spouse going on an expensive trip or posing with an expensive car can undermine such claim  and, potentially affect that party’s credibility in court if presented as evidence on a motion or at trial.

Further to photograph-based posts, statements that are made on social media by one party can be relevant if said posts (i) are related to the litigation, to issues of parenting  and/or (b) they contradict statements that were made by the party in his or her pleadings. For example, if a party who is attempting to establish that he or she is an appropriate custodial parent, then recent social media posts about extensive partying and drug use made by that party may be relevant in court, as they may speak to that party’s fitness when it comes to appropriate supervision of a child in his or her care.

The Ontario Attorney General’s website estimates that divorce proceedings can take approximately four to six months to complete, provided that all documents have been appropriately accomplished and submitted on time.

No. The law does not favour mothers over fathers in divorce proceedings. The judge will base his decision on the evidence laid out by both parties.

The main distinction between divorce and separation is that divorce ends your marriage formally. You and your partner are no longer married.
If you’re separated, you’re still legally married to each other even if you receive a formal separation, and you must continue to record that you’re married on documents.

No. You are not required to get a lawyer for a divorce. However, it is best if you retain one to ensure that you fully understand all your rights and obligations.

A joint divorce application occurs when you and your spouse both agree to a divorce and on all other family law matters such as parenting, spousal support, or division of property.

Yes, it is different. Family law problems are addressed mainly by provincial laws in Ontario. Divorce law, on the other hand, is controlled by federal legislation in the form of the Divorce Act, which applies uniformly across the country.

Divorce can be a difficult decision to make, especially if you’re unsure if your partner will sign the petition. However, a divorce does not require your partner’s consent. Although it may be a long process if your partner doesn’t comply, they will not be able to stop you indefinitely.

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