“The only constant in life is change“. And there is no question that the end of a relationship is a huge change. But what if instead of fearing all the change in your post-relationship life, you embrace the opportunities?! What if you shift your perspective…?
Permission To Focus on You
Most of us are so busy dealing with work, kids, parents, friends, and errands that there seems to be little time to slow down (or dare stop) for a bit to focus on ourselves. Especially during a separation, you may feel as though you’re just hanging on, getting through each day. You’ve already spent so much time, energy, and money on dealing with your ex, your finances, and all the other details of your separation, it can feel too selfish to think about spending time on yourself. Would you tell a friend to strike herself off her priority list? Never! And nor should you. Consider this your official permission slip: Permission to take some time to focus inward and re-connect with the real you.
Your Authentic Self
Ask yourself: In the course of your relationships, have you been unfaithful to yourself? Have you internalized your partner’s values or tried to be the person you think he/she wanted you to be? Regaining your sense of self at the end of a relationship is critical. Discover, uncover, and recover your authentic self – the person you are at your core – your values, your strengths, your uniqueness – unleash the brilliance within. Take a minute and think of a specific situation in your life when you were at your best. Where were you? What were you doing? What did it feel like to be you? Write down 5 words to describe how you felt. Now look at that list of words. Do those words describe you today? Shouldn’t they?
Move Towards Your Brilliant Future
Coaching is a process where you spend time focusing on you – where you are and how you want to be. Working with your strengths, you are able to gain personal insights which lead to your ability to notice and consider fresh choices. Your goals become clearer and you choose an action plan to help you reach those goals which align with who you truly are. You find that obstacles are no longer insurmountable and you become “unstuck”. You are reminded that you are whole, resourceful, and creative. You can live your brilliant life.
Bring on change. You’ve got this!
Lisa Eisen is co-founder of Click & Co., a coaching and consulting company dedicated to inspiring people to live brilliantly. Lisa is also a qualified (mostly non-practicing) family law lawyer. She can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org