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You know it is coming. You’ve been ruminating about this for some time. You realize that you and your spouse are headed for a divorce. When contemplating the winter holidays and divorce, you might be considering waiting until after the holidays to begin the divorce process because you are waiting for just the right moment.

That’s all well and good, but be cautious…the perfect moment might never come. Holding off may also cause your irritation and misery to reach a tipping point over the holidays, which could have you prematurely saying things that you might later regret (and/or conceivably breaking the news to your loved ones in a way you would not ordinarily have chosen).

Before or After

Some people cannot fathom spending another holiday season with their spouse. That’s okay. If the less objectionable choice is to get your divorce underway, only you can decide what works best for you and your family.

Initiating divorce proceedings before the holidays may cause more harm than good. Occasionally it makes perfect sense to wait until the holidays are over to separate from your spouse.  You probably don’t want to be in the midst of custody disputes just as the holidays roll around. You and your family may also have invested a significant amount of money making vacation plans that involve the entire family.

Where children are involved, it might be easier to hold off sharing any divorce news with close family and friends. Although children (in time) will have to confront divorce as well, many parents are reluctant to spoil such quality time with all the immensity that comes with talk of divorce. However, only you can determine what’s best.

Meeting with your family lawyer prior to the holidays is not the same as making bold statements regarding what you believe to be an inevitable divorce. It’s important that you get all the facts before making such an important and life-changing decision. In fact, getting educated on separation and divorce may give you valuable insight and help you make the most informed choice.