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Understanding Parental Alienation in Ontario

Published: May 15, 2024

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Understanding Parental Alienation in Ontario

In Ontario, parental alienation is recognized as a serious concern that can negatively impact the parent-child relationship as well as the well-being of the child.  Alienating actions may be subject to legal consequences in Ontario, whether they have occurred deliberately or unintentionally in family law proceedings. Speaking to a family lawyer can help clarify what your rights are as a parent. Contact our Toronto child custody and access lawyers at Gelman & Associates today to learn more about how parental alienation may be affecting your family.

What is Parental Alienation?

Parental alienation refers to a series of repetitive behaviours committed by one parent that damage or undermine another parent’s relationship with their child. Parental alienation can be carried out by biological parents or stepparents and may be more likely to occur during a hostile separation or divorce. Often, parental alienation occurs following disputes over decision-making responsibility (custody) or parenting time.

It is important to be aware of whether a child’s opposition to one parent has occurred due to alienation or because the child has a legitimate cause, such as abuse or neglect. Navigating the nuances of a parent-child relationship, especially when divorce or separation are involved, can be challenging. Mental health professionals and family lawyers can help determine if parental alienation is affecting your family.

Signs of Parental Alienation

Some signs that a parent is intentionally alienating another parent from their child may be:

  • Making the child feel guilty for expressing positive emotions toward the alienated parent
  • Speaking negatively about the alienated parent in the presence of the child
  • Preventing visitation or access that has been previously agreed upon
  • And more

Signs that a child may be alienated from a parent include:

  • Rejection of the alienated parent for minor reasons
  • Repeating negative words about the alienated parent in a script-like or uncharacteristically mature way
  • Extending the rejection of the alienated parent to their relatives or pets
  • And more

It is important to recognize whether your family relationships have been affected by parental alienation or whether another issue is at play. If a child displays only temporary, not continual, hostility towards a parent, parental alienation may not be the explanation. In addition, parental alienation may be unlikely if a child exhibits an aversion to both parents instead of one in particular. We often recommend seeking professional advice from counsellors during instances like this. 

Is Parental Alienation Child Abuse?

In Ontario, court cases have recognized parental alienation as a form of emotional abuse and family violence. This is because parental alienation can have negative long-term effects on children.

Parental Alienation Syndrome refers to a condition developed by children subjected to particularly persistent or intense alienation. If a child internalizes their animosity towards a targeted parent, a host of behavioural challenges may arise. These include:

  • Expressing acute anger and refusing to spend time with the alienated parent or their family
  • Criticizing the alienated parent in an uncharacteristically mature manner
  • Negative behaviour towards new partners of the alienated parent
  • Suffering from depression or anxiety
  • Poor academic performance
  • And more

If you believe your child’s well-being may be at risk due to parental alienation, contact our family law lawyers at Gelman & Associates for legal help.

Parental Alienation under Ontario Law

The Divorce Act outlines that children should have regular access to both parents following their separation or divorce, so long as it is in the child’s best interests. Under Section 16(3), acting in the best interest of the child includes “a spouse’s willingness to support the development and maintenance of the child’s relationship with the other spouse.” Parents who unfairly restrict access or subject a child to harmful alienating behaviours may be subject to legal penalties. Parental alienation may be recognized in court when:

  • A positive relationship with the targeted parent existed prior to alienation
  • There is an absence of abuse by the targeted parent
  • The alienating parent has used alienating strategies
  • The child exhibits alienated behaviours or symptoms of Parental Alienation Syndrome

In Bruni v. Bruni (2010), an Ontario court found that a mother had intentionally damaged the relationship between her children and their father beyond repair. As a result, her spousal support was reduced to $1.00 a month. Hong v. Rooney (2012) similarly saw a mother remove her child from her and the father’s former home without consent to restrict access to the father. Because the court found the mother unable to support a relationship between the father and child, the father was awarded sole decision-making responsibility. 

Can Parental Alienation Affect Decision-Making Responsibility (Custody)?

A proposed amendment to the Divorce Act, Bill C-78, indicates that parental alienation should influence family court decisions. As a result, consequences for parental alienation can include changes to decision-making responsibility or decreased parenting time. In some cases, sole decision-making responsibility may be awarded to the parent who has been alienated in an attempt to re-establish a healthy relationship.

It is important to note that both parents are treated equally by courts judging parental alienation and decision-making responsibility. A court will only restrict a parent’s rights when it is in the best interest of the child to do so. In cases like Rogerson v. Tessaro (2006) or A.G.L v. K.B.D (2009) where the mother has been found guilty of engaging in alienation, decision-making responsibility has been awarded to the father.

How to Prevent Parental Alienation & What to Do if It Has Occurred

There are steps you can take to prevent parental alienation from escalating during a separation or divorce:

  • Maintain as much contact with your child as possible
  • Cultivate positive, fun, and enjoyable interactions with your child
  • Do not employ alienating actions against another parent
  • Employ a mediator to facilitate positive negotiations between you and your former partner regarding decision-making responsibility or parenting time

In cases where parental alienation has already occurred, actions may be taken to minimize further damage:

  • Collect and record evidence of alienating actions committed by another parent
  • Inform the alienating parent of your concerns and make requests to access your child in writing
  • Participate in reunification therapy to restore a healthy family dynamic following estrangement
  • Obtain a court order that legally defines visitation and parenting time
  • Speak with a family lawyer immediately

If you feel the severity of parental alienation necessitates legal intervention, our family law lawyers at Gelman & Associates can be of assistance.

Speak to Our Family Lawyers Today

Children should be protected from conflict between their parents, regardless of the conditions of a separation or divorce. Our family law lawyers at Gelman & Associates are capable of providing specific and tailored advice to help relieve the impacts of parental alienation on your family. Schedule a consultation with our family lawyers today.

Disclaimer: For specific legal advice on your family law matter, please consult with a family law lawyer. The content in this article is not intended to act as legal advice and is instead intended to act as a general overview of a legal topic.

Written by Lisa Gelman

Senior Lawyer

Senior Lawyer Lisa Gelman has over 25 years of family law experience and founded Gelman & Associates to provide strategic legal counsel in family law matters concerning divorce, parenting, separation, and more.

Frequently Asked Questions - child custody & access

It is not uncommon for someone to want to relocate after a divorce. If you still live in the marital residence, the familiar surroundings and memories may be too much for your heart to handle. Or in the process of reinventing yourself post-divorce you may want to take a new job, move closer to your friends and family, or simply wish to start fresh somewhere new. There are many reasons a person may want to move after going through a divorce, however if you have children you will need to think twice before making a big move.

Emotionally, it can be challenging for a child to move to an unfamiliar place. Often, they are most at ease in a familiar environment with access to family and friends. Changing schools, living in a new city or even a new house can be difficult on a child, especially after dealing with the emotional turmoil associated with divorce.

Legally, there are certain implications to relocating away from the current jurisdiction where the children ordinarily reside. Before moving you and the noncustodial parent can negotiate with the absence of a lawyer, a written agreement about the moce and any changes to visitation that may be needed. If you cannot reach an agreement about the move, you then must file an Application/Motion to the court to hear your matter and for a judge to make a decision before you move. Usually the court requires at least 30 days notice to the other parent of your court Application/Motion. It may take longer to reach an agreement with the other parent or get a court order. It is a good idea to give notice of 90 days before the move, as as soon as possible and to consult with a lawyer first. Upon receiving this notice, they can challenge your proposed change of residence or apply for a variation to the existing custody or access orders.

The leading case that sets out the legal test in determining mobility is Gordon vs. Goertz (1996) 2. S.C.R. 27

Similar to any other action involving variation of an existing custody order, the person challenging the relocation has to show that the move will result in a material change in circumstances affecting the child. Once this has been established, a judge will determine the best interests of the child in light of the relevant circumstances. These relevant circumstances include the existing custody and access relationship, the relationship between the child and the custodial parent, the views of the child, and the reason for the proposed change of residence among other circumstances. As with every other custody proceeding, the judges determination will turn on the best interests of the child. The judge’s inquiry is individualized and will involve all factors relevant to the case at hand.

Because mobility has become so easy in today’s society, often separation agreements or custody orders will address relocation and place specific restrictions on changing residences. Non-removal clauses that ban the extra-provincial removal of children without consent of the noncustodial parent. In these cases, the custodial parent who wishes to relocate will have to initiate the action by placing an application with the court.

If you are contemplating a move, you must consider the emotional needs of your child, as well as your former spouse’s right to challenge your relocation. Typically, courts only allow a custodial parent to relocate if the proposed move is in good faith and not intended to frustrate the noncustodial parent’s relationship with the child. Additionally, if a custodial parent relocates, they must be willing to accommodate the noncustodial parent’s access to the child; sometimes this means that the relocating parent will have to pay the additional costs of access.

In sum, if you are a custodial parent, moving isn’t as easy as just loading up the car and hitting the road – but it is still possible.

Yes, but they will need to establish paternity, especially if the father and the mother separate. Here are the ways to establish paternity as recognized by the court:

  • Act of birth
  • Presumption of paternity
  • Uninterrupted possession of status
  • Voluntary declaration

No. Even when the parents are unmarried, divorced, or separated, one parent cannot keep the child from seeing the other unless the court deems it appropriate to the child’s best interests.

Historically, mothers have been more likely to get sole custody of their child in both consent and contested orders, as they are usually the child’s primary caregiver. However, as more mothers also work outside the home, courts could also rule in favor of the father.

The majority of judges strive to make decisions that are in your children’s best interest. Giving full custody to one parent is usually the best option, except in cases with concerns such as child or substance abuse. This typically means keeping in contact with and maintaining relationships with both parents.
You should do everything possible to prepare for the subsequent child custody negotiations, whether you’re a parent seeking full custody or shared custody:
Be honest with yourself about your ability to manage things alone, in terms of practicality, finances, and other factors. You may get the result you want by presenting the strongest case for custody by doing the following:

  • Make a Strategy: If custody is granted, a court will expect you to be ready. Compile thoughtful replies to hypothetical queries posed in court.
  • Speak with people who have gone through the child custody procedure before you. They may provide you advice and tell you what to anticipate.
  • Judges look for proof of a meaningful relationship in addition to making sure you can provide a child’s practical and basic needs. Simply put, be involved in your children’s lives.
  • Continue to pay child support regularly, whether you’re asking the court for full or shared custody. When you start the procedure, you’ll want to make sure you have a strong track record.
  • Keep a detailed log of your visitation schedule. This is a crucial aspect of obtaining child custody. Visitation records reflect how often you see your children under the present arrangements and your dependability, as well as dedication to them.
  • During all child custody hearings, the court will inquire about acceptable living accommodations. Even if you live in a tiny apartment, you should create a unique and secure environment for your child.
  • Courts may determine child custody in part by how you treat your child’s other parent. Being hostile or unpleasant to the other parent makes collaborative decision-making more complicated and can break apart parent-child ties. As a result, judges are more inclined to favor the parent who isn’t behaving badly.
  • While parents typically spend a lot of time thinking about what they believe is best for their children, children’s perspectives are sometimes overlooked. The court will be interested in learning what the children desire and will most likely question them directly at some point throughout the proceedings. You can better inform your decision-making by asking your child what they think.

No. Parenting time and child support are different from each other. While it is a child’s right to be provided with financial support, it is also their right to spend time with their parents. Thus, even if the child support was cancelled the parent formerly supporting can still enjoy parenting time with the child.

“There is no fixed age for when a child can say which parent they want to live with after a divorce. However, by law, a child must be 16 years old to decide on this matter. The exception to this is when there is a court order stating that a child/ren must live with one parent until they turn 17 or 18.

Under certain circumstances, it is possible to legally prevent your child/ren’s father from seeing or contacting them. It may be necessary if he presents a potential danger to your child/ren. If you were never married to the father of your child and there is no court order saying otherwise, you can do anything you want until paternity is confirmed.

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