When you’re going through a divorce, it’s hard to process all the emotions that you experience. The last thing on your mind might be forgiveness—but with time, you might find it’s the final step you need to take before moving on. Whether you have just had an initial consultation with a Mississauga divorce lawyer or you are already on your own, forgiving your ex is part of leading a healthy emotional life.
Who Benefits from Forgiveness?
Your ex may never ask you for forgiveness, let alone deserve it. However, it’s not for your ex’s benefit. It’s for yours.
Forgiving Your Ex: What it Really Means
There’s a major difference between forgiving someone and trusting them. When you forgive your ex, whether he or she tried to rob you of spousal support in court or subjected you to the horrors of domestic violence, it simply means that you’re letting go of anger, resentment and vengeful thoughts.
Your Mississauga divorce lawyer will tell you that forgiving your ex isn’t a denial that he or she hurt you. It doesn’t justify what your ex did to you. It only means that you’re giving up the unhappy emotions attached to his or her actions.
Immediate Benefits of Forgiveness
Most psychologists agree that when you forgive your ex, it’s easier to move on with the rest of your life. Not only does a healthy dose of forgiveness lower your blood pressure and lead to less anxiety, it can:
- Lead to healthier relationships
- Lighten symptoms of depression
- Relieve stress and feelings of hostility
- Lower your risk of alcohol or substance abuse
Healthier Relationships Through Forgiveness
Forgiving your ex for what he or she has put you through is not always easy, but the benefits are worth the effort. If you’re up to it, you can always ask your Mississauga divorce lawyer for a referral to a local therapist who can help you talk through your emotions.
After weighing how your ex’s treatment made you the person you are today, it might be easier to make the life-changing decision to forgive. Whether or not you choose to work with a therapist, just the fact that you’re considering letting go of the negative emotions your spouse created in you means that you are on the way to a healthier, happier life.
