When your kids are involved in school sports and your child custody agreement splits up practice days between you and your ex, who’s supposed to be sitting in the bleachers? Should you lay low on your ex’s days and expect him or her to do the same, or is it okay for both of you to go?
What Your Mississauga Divorce Lawyer Might Suggest
Since you’re a parent 100 percent of the time—not just when you physically have your children—it’s natural to want to take part in their activities. However, if you and your ex can’t even be within 50 feet of one another without arguing, slinging insults and finger-pointing, your Mississauga divorce lawyer might advise you to lay low until the situation has cooled off a bit.
It’s best to double-check with your lawyer before simply showing up on your ex’s day. Your lawyer can let you know if you need to make special concessions and whether it matters who goes to practice on which days.
Ask Your Children
It’s usually okay to ask your kids if they’d like you to go to practice and cheer them on, but be careful; you might be putting them in an awkward position. If it’s not your day with the children, let them know you can be in the stands but that you want them to spend time before and after practice with their other parent.
The Big Don’ts
When you do attend your kids’ sports practices, there are a few things you should never do:
- If you’re still in the process of getting a divorce, do not bring a new romantic interest. Your lawyer has probably already warned you about the dangers of dating during divorce, and you don’t want to do anything that could damage your case.
- Don’t make a scene. No matter how much you dislike your ex (or his or her new flame, who could also show up), the playing field is no place for you to hash things out. If your ex does show up with a new significant other, step outside and call your lawyer… and count to five before you go back in.
- Make sure your kids don’t feel guilty for not spending time with you. Let them focus on the sport and spending time with mom or dad. This is about them, not you, and they deserve to enjoy practice without feeling guilty.
Keep Your Lawyer in the Loop
Let your lawyer know if any conflicts arise when it comes to participating in your kids’ lives. He or she can help you protect your rights—and your kids’ rights—under Ontario law.