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Substance Abuse and Divorce

Published: December 15, 2015

Last Updated: September 8, 2025

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Substance Abuse and Divorce

Addiction can alter or even destroy relationships, so it’s no surprise that it can sometimes be a factor in a couples’ divorce as well.  It can cause trust issues, financial problems, and concerns about raising children.  Dependency can take the person with whom you fell in love and completely transform them into your worst nightmare.  It can aggravate other issues a couple might be having, and can be just as detrimental to a divorce as an extramarital affair.  When confronting substance abuse and divorce, the choice to leave an addict can be even more difficult and scary than a divorce where substance issues are not present.

Here are a few things you should understand if you’re facing a divorce that involves substance abuse:

Skewed Perspective:
It’s important to remember that someone who is dealing with addiction may not have an accurate sense of reality.  He or she may not realize just how much damage their dependency is causing.  They often try to justify their behaviour or claim that the sober spouse is lying.  They may even blame you for their problem.  Be prepared for such an eventuality from the outset.

Inform Your Lawyer:
It can be scary to live in a home with someone who has an addiction.  Your first inclination may be to move yourself and your children out or act in other ways that initiate the separation process, but before you do anything (unless physical harm has been threatened or committed), consult with your lawyer first.  Anything you do or say may be thoroughly examined in court later on, and you need to protect yourself. Also, your lawyer can’t help you if he or she isn’t fully informed, so be completely honest during your consultation and throughout.

What About the Children?:
Substance abuse is an even more significant issue in divorce cases that involve children.  If you’re concerned that your spouse may be abusing drugs or alcohol, you can request supervised visitations.  Keep in mind, though, you’ll have to prove your spouse’s dependency in order for this to be awarded.  This may involve pictures, videos, evidence of arrests or hospitalizations, and testimonials.  A so-called “functioning alcoholic” may be difficult to prove if he or she is still keeping a job and providing for the family.

Overall, substance abuse can be a big factor in a divorce case.  Being the sober spouse may give you the upper hand in a settlement, but it’s important to remember that substance abuse is a serious issue.  Presenting evidence in court of substance abuse is a process that must be treated carefully and honestly since it can damage your spouse’s reputation and even their career. This is important to consider if any support payments are being sought in the divorce. In some cases, it may also even lead to criminal charges.  As a result, it’s best to consult with your lawyer and make sure you know all the facts before diving in.

If you or someone you care about is facing a drug or alcohol problem, please visit the Ontario Governments’ Drug and Alcohol Helpline.

Written by Lisa Gelman

Senior Lawyer

Senior Lawyer Lisa Gelman has over 25 years of family law experience and founded Gelman & Associates to provide strategic legal counsel in family law matters concerning divorce, parenting, separation, and more.

Frequently Asked Questions - divorce & separation

If you or your spouse are not in Canada, you can not get a divorce. However, you can end your marriage under the Civil Marriage Act. You can only end your marriage in Canada and not another country because your marriage is only valid in Canada.

Yes, you can date while separated in Canada. However, there is a legal implication to that. If the timing of your new relationship comes into question during your divorce, your relationship may be considered as an affair or adultery.

Yes. Our legal services are available in person, online, and over the phone. In addition, although our main office is located in Toronto, we have over 8 additional satellite offices located throughout central, southern, western, and eastern Ontario to serve family law clients across the province.

If you are litigating your matter, social media posts made by your spouse or partner may be relevant, especially if they contradict what your spouse is claiming in his or her pleadings.

For example, if a spouse is claiming financial hardship, a Facebook post that shows that spouse going on an expensive trip or posing with an expensive car can undermine such claim and potentially affect that party’s credibility in court if presented as evidence on a motion or at trial.

Further to photograph-based posts, statements that are made on social media by one party can be relevant if said posts (i) are related to the litigation, to issues of parenting and/or (b) contradict statements that were made by the party in his or her pleadings. For example, if a party is attempting to establish that he or she is an appropriate custodial parent, then recent social media posts about extensive partying and drug use made by that party may be relevant in court, as they may speak to that party’s fitness when it comes to appropriate supervision of a child in his or her care.

Yes, you can separate from your spouse. Separation does not have to lead to divorce. However, if you plan to remarry, you must file for divorce after one year of separation. Also, you may want to consider that if you just leave, your spouse may file for spousal support or child support.

It is advised however that before leaving, you try to have a separation agreement with your spouse.

Divorce can be a difficult decision to make, especially if you’re unsure if your partner will sign the petition. However, a divorce does not require your partner’s consent. Although it may be a long process if your partner doesn’t comply, they will not be able to stop you indefinitely.

The only ground for a divorce in Canada’s Divorce Act is marriage breakdown. This could include spousal infidelity, although infidelity alone could be difficult and emotionally taxing to prove in court.

You are not legally required to retain a lawyer to apply for divorce. However, a divorce application may involve important questions about parenting, support, property and procedural requirements. Independent legal advice can help you understand how a proposed agreement or court application may affect you.

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