After you and your spouse have decided to call it quits, you’ll likely find someone new. There is no set time frame regarding how long you’ll wait to move on – every person is different. Most people remarry within five years of divorce, according to a 2006 presentation in delivered in Montreal by the U.S. Census Bureau.
What Does That Mean for You?
If you find someone new during or after your divorce – which statistics suggest you are likely to do – you’ll need to introduce your new partner to your kids at some point. Be sure you tell your Toronto divorce lawyer immediately if you start a new romantic relationship during your divorce; the outcome of your case may depend on yourToronto divorce lawyer knowing that you’re involved with someone new.
When to Introduce Your New Partner to Your Kids
Your Toronto divorce lawyer may suggest that you keep your new relationship under wraps if you’re in the middle of a divorce. That includes keeping photos off social media sites like Facebook and Twitter.Torontodivorce lawyers can tell you that the old saying “loose lips sink ships” is also true during divorce cases. Generally, the more you keep to yourself, the better.
If your Toronto divorce lawyer has given you the green light to make your new relationship public, or if your divorce is completely finalized, you should still proceed with caution; not because it will damage your case, but because it may be harmful to your kids’ well-being.
Take as much time as you need before you introduce your new partner. Your kids will continue to adjust to changes caused by the divorce for up to three years, according to Canadian Living Magazine, and adding yet another change too quickly might be asking for trouble.
Breaking the News to Your Kids
Long before you introduce your new partner, let your kids know that you’re dating. Don’t tell them anything, though, until your Toronto divorce lawyer feels your new relationship won’t harm your case.
Remember that kids aren’t as emotionally mature as adults are, so they may react differently than you expect. While a preschooler might not seem to care, a teen might go into his or her room (and possibly slam the door, lock it and blast the stereo) and take some alone time to process the news. Make sure your kids know that they do, and always will, come first.
Introducing Your New Partner
Before you actually introduce your new partner, make sure he or she is a keeper; your kids don’t need to ride an emotional roller coaster. Again, make sure your Toronto divorce lawyer has given the green light for you to make the introduction.
Choose a neutral location, like a park, playground or restaurant. That way, your kids can shift focus from your new partner to something else if they become uncomfortable. Avoid physical contact with your new partner to avoid making your kids uncomfortable, too, and don’t make it an all-day affair. Your kids will want to test the waters and slowly get to know your new partner without you forcing him or her on them.
First and foremost, though, make sure your Toronto divorce lawyer knows about your new partner and has determined that it’s okay to introduce your kids. Since every case is different, only yourTorontodivorce lawyer can tell you whether your relationship will affect the outcome of your divorce.