The decision to begin dating following separation is a personal one, but it is important to understand how a new relationship may affect an ongoing family law matter. While there is no prohibition against dating before a divorce is finalized, the circumstances surrounding a new relationship may become relevant to spousal support, parenting, property division, and the separation date.
In this blog, we will examine when a new relationship may become relevant to a family law matter and the considerations that arise when parties begin cohabiting, combine finances, or introduce a new partner to their children.
Can You Date While Separated in Ontario?
Under the federal Divorce Act, a divorce may be granted where the marriage has effectively broken down. The most common ground for divorce is that the spouses have lived separate and apart for at least one year. Adultery and cruelty are also statutory grounds for establishing marriage breakdown.
Dating during this one-year period is not prohibited, although the circumstances surrounding a new relationship may become relevant to other issues in the family law matter.
Does Dating During Separation Constitute Adultery?
A sexual or romantic relationship with someone other than a spouse before a divorce is finalized may constitute adultery under the Divorce Act. However, adultery does not, by itself, affect a spouse’s entitlement to property, equalization, or spousal support.
Spouses who have already separated will often proceed on the basis of having lived separate and apart for at least one year rather than relying on adultery as the ground for divorce. The fact that a new relationship may constitute adultery does not determine the outcome of the other issues arising from the separation.
Does Dating Affect the Separation Date?
The date of separation is important in family law matters as it can affect the equalization of net family property, the determination of the valuation date for married spouses, and the assessment of certain support matters.
Dating someone new may be relevant evidence when determining whether a previous relationship has ended, but it is not what establishes the date of separation. In determining what establishes the date of separation, the court may consider the parties’ circumstances as a whole, including:
- Whether there was an intention by one or both spouses to end the relationship;
- Whether the parties continued to live together;
- Whether they continued to function as a family;
- Whether they continued to maintain a social or financial relationship;
- Whether they communicated to others that the relationship had ended;
- Whether there was a physical or sexual relationship; and
- Any other circumstances demonstrating whether the marital relationship had ended.
If one spouse begins dating someone new shortly after the claimed date of separation, the timing of that relationship may be considered when determining the date on which the marriage ended. However, it does not automatically establish the date on which the parties separated.
In situations where the separation date is disputed, parties should seek legal advice from a Toronto divorce lawyer before assuming the date.
Can Dating Affect Spousal Support?
Entering a new relationship does not automatically terminate or reduce a person’s entitlement to spousal support. Spousal support is determined based on several factors, including the circumstances of the relationship, each party’s financial circumstances, the economic advantages and disadvantages arising from the relationship and its breakdown, and the parties’ respective obligations.
The distinction between dating and cohabitation can be important when determining spousal support. Dating a new partner, while maintaining separate residences and finances, will not generally affect an existing support entitlement. However, if the relationship progresses to cohabitation, the parties’ shared living expenses and financial circumstances may become relevant to whether support should be continued, reduced, or varied.
Anyone receiving or seeking spousal support should therefore obtain legal advice from a Toronto spousal support lawyer before moving in with a new partner, particularly where support has not yet been finalized.
Dating Post-Separation and Parenting Arrangements
Ontario courts determine parenting issues based on the best interests of the child. The fact that a parent is dating does not mean that the parent is acting contrary to the child’s best interests. The relevant considerations may instead include the circumstances of the new relationship and whether it affects the child’s safety, stability, emotional well-being, or relationship with either parent.
For example, a court may consider:
- The nature and stability of the new relationship;
- The timing and circumstances of introducing the new partner to the children;
- The new partner’s conduct around the children;
- Whether the new relationship is creating conflict or instability;
- Whether there are legitimate safety concerns involving the new partner; and
- The impact, if any, on the child’s relationship with each parent.
There is no universal waiting period in Ontario that requires a parent to wait a specific amount of time before introducing a new partner to their children. Children may require time to adjust to the separation of their parents and the changes to their family structure.
Introducing a new partner very shortly after separation may create additional uncertainty, particularly where the relationship is still new or unstable. Parents should therefore consider the children’s age, maturity, adjustment to the separation, and the stability of the new relationship before introducing a new partner.
In some cases, parents may also agree to provisions in a separation agreement addressing the introduction of new romantic partners to the children. Any such provision should be carefully drafted to reflect the circumstances of the particular family with the assistance of a legal professional.
Can Your Ex-Spouse Stop You from Dating?
One spouse cannot prohibit the other from dating because they disagree with the decision. Similarly, the fact that a parent is dating does not automatically give the other parent a right to withhold parenting time.
However, if there are legitimate concerns about the new partner’s conduct or the impact of the relationship on the children, those concerns may become relevant to a parenting dispute. For example, concerns involving domestic or family violence, substance abuse, criminal activity, or other conduct that creates a genuine risk to the children may require consideration by the court.
The distinction between a parent’s personal disagreement with a new relationship and a legitimate child-focused concern is therefore important. If your former spouse is threatening to restrict your parenting time because you are dating, legal advice should be obtained before the dispute escalates.
Social Media and Dating During Separation
Parties should be mindful that their social media activity, including pictures, comments, or location information, may become relevant in a family law proceeding depending on the issues in dispute.
For example, a person who claims that they are unable to meet a financial obligation may face questions about photographs showing expensive vacations with a new partner, restaurant outings, purchases, or other discretionary spending.
It is generally advisable to assume that public social media activity may eventually be reviewed by the other party or their lawyer during divorce proceedings.
Practical Considerations When Dating During Separation
If you decide to begin dating following separation, there are several practical considerations to keep in mind:
- Understand your financial position: Avoid using significant family funds to finance a new relationship before property issues have been resolved.
- Consider the implications of cohabitation: Moving in with a new partner can affect the financial circumstances of your household and may become relevant to an existing or proposed spousal support claim.
- Prioritize the children’s stability: Consider the children’s adjustment to the separation before introducing a new partner into their lives.
- Review existing agreements and orders: Ensure that your conduct remains consistent with any existing separation agreement, parenting arrangement, or court order.
- Consider the timing of a new relationship: Where parenting, support, or property issues remain unresolved, beginning a new relationship may increase conflict and make settlement negotiations more difficult.
- Avoid involving children in adult disputes: Children should not be placed in the position of communicating information about a parent’s dating life to the other parent.
- Obtain advice before major changes: Consider obtaining legal advice before moving in with a new partner, combining finances, or making significant changes to the children’s routines.
Speak With an Experienced Toronto Family Lawyer at Gelman and Associates About Dating During Separation
Dating during the period of separation may become relevant to issues including spousal support, property division, parenting arrangements, the separation date, and settlement negotiations. The legal implications may change when a relationship progresses from dating to cohabitation. Moving in with a new partner may affect spousal support, while using family funds or assets may raise property issues.
At Gelman and Associates, our family law lawyers assist clients with the legal and practical issues that arise during separation, including parenting, support, property division, and separation agreements. If you are separated and have questions about separation and divorce in Ontario, dating, a new relationship, or its potential impact on your family law matter, contact our Toronto family lawyers to schedule a confidential consultation.
